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MMD > Archives > July 1997 > 1997.07.06 > 03Prev  Next


Building an Orchestrion (the Wrong Way)
By Craig Brougher

Andy Taylor got it completely right and I will say three cheers for Andy!
There are several reasons why Ragtime Automatic Music will _never_ make
decent equipment until they start listening to the people who know the
difference between stuff that works and stuff that doesn't.

The major problem I have noticed in their stacks and throughout the
machine are their ridiculous valves, which could never work the same way
twice.  What is amazing to me is how they've managed to sell these
instruments.  But I have had folks ask me what I think, and when I tell
them, they just say, "Well, he's been in business now for years and has
been doing really well, seems to me.  So I think I will just go with
success, Craig, and try one."

Then the instrument just sits.  The only guy I've ever heard of who could
actually "try" one is that guy who eats everything -- like bicycles,
chairs, etc. -- for Ripleys' "Believe it or Not."  As a matter of fact,
it makes us think, "You know, I bet there's money in building a large
knock-down cardboard box with a solid plastic molded keyboard that just
looks like a piano.  You unfold it, snap in the tabs, and there it is!
A pianer!  And your wife can move it anytime she has the urge to
vacuum."

That's for people who want a piano, but who would never play it.

Another nice classic touch to this purchase would be to frame the bill of
sale and hang it up on the wall beside the pianer.  So if somebody says,
"It doesn't even play," you can say, "Yeah, we know, but look what we
paid fer it.  We got a lot better deal than Andy -- his doesn't play
either!"

Craig Brougher


(Message sent Sun 6 Jul 1997, 13:02:43 GMT, from time zone GMT.)

Key Words in Subject:  an, Building, Orchestrion, Way, Wrong

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