1. Buying player pianos gives a young collector the chance to tell his
wife that they are just like money in the bank!
2. They also give an older collector a very good reason to change
the subject when the wife, who has stuck by him through all of this
collecting, suggests that he go to "the bank" and cash in a few pianos.
3. Player pianos are useful in keeping the chiropractors in business.
4. Player pianos are very useful for holding down the floor in a
5. Player pianos are useful for their flat top surface while holding
down that floor.
6. They're also good for frustrating their owner when the need arises
to empty that warehouse, and who now has to empty those flat tops
before being able to move the pianos.
If only I had known that D. L. Bullock existed, I would have let "Him"
be my banker! What a joy it must be to be able to roam through someone
else's players and select just the one you want for the job at hand.